Friday, 23 January 2009

Pain and Analysis

Ouch....I fell down stairs a little while ago and now I`m starting to ache a bit. I was carry a bundle of washing and had almost reached the bottom stair when I tripped over a sleeping Jake. Well you should have heard the rumpus. I screamed out my best Anglo Saxon as I dived headlong and only saved myself by grabbling hold of the bookcase in the hall. Jake yelped and ran away as all the washing hit the floor. I wasn`t hurt at the time and I worried that I`d hurt Jake but it turned out he was more frightened of his crazy owner attacking him and throwing washing all over! Now my left ankle is a bit sore, my right thumb feels as though its come out of its socket and my shoulders feel as though they`ve been twisted, well they were actually but you know what I mean. It had been such a good day till then too. The weather had been appalling, windy with heavy rain all day but I was in a really good mood despite getting soaked several times at work.

Which brings me to a subject I`ve wanted to write about but kept deciding that I wouldn`t, until now. My good mood follows a week where I`ve been feeling really down. From time to time I feel really happy about life, elated almost without any particular reason. Then without exception I feel terribly depressed for a few days. I feel everyone dislikes me and are talking about me and I`m so tearful, its ridiculous. At least now I know that its not serious but have come to accept it for what it is. I`ve not really looked at it too deeply because I know I`ll feel better soon. I don`t know what causes it though I wonder if perhaps its a form of manic depression. Whatever it is its a part of me and just a cross that I have to bear...sigh.

I saw Kerry on Wednesday and we went shopping together which is something we do very little of these days. Her pregnancy is in its 30th week and all is well with her and the baby. Roman was in a lovely mood and whilst we were walking along the street inWindsor when he turned to me and said, "Nanna, I love you," So I said " Well I love you too darling," I was so happy I thought my heart would burst, bless him.

Bye Bye for now and have a lovely weekend. :o)