Sad News

Hello Friends,

I`m sorry to have to tell you that we had to have Jake put to sleep on Tuesday evening. He has been getting worse over the last two weeks but not too bad, he certainly wasn`t in pain but had started to eat less and less and was sleeping more and more.On the Tuesday morning he had worsened drastically since the day before. he didn`t even raise his head when I got up in the morning and when he did he didn`t even attampt to move from his bed. I hand fed him some chicken wish he took slowly but gratefully. I knew he was just too weak and I knew it was time. I don`t know how I managed to work that day but somehow I got through the morning without making mistakes but couldn`t wait to get home to my precious boy.When Jim got home we had that difficult conversation, we talked and cried for an hour before the vet called us with Jake`s latest blood test results. They were as bad as its possible to be so it made the decision easier to make. We said goodbye to him at 6.30pm Tuesday 24th November. His head was on my lap the whole time and I`m not even sure he was aware of anything. I stroke his head, kissed him and told him that I loved him and he just slipped away. Our gorgeous boy....we miss him so much it hurts. I know it will get easier, today is better than yesterday, but it will take a while. One day soon another dog will join our household but for the moment it feels as though Jake is still here...maybe he is, who can say...

Run free precious boy, chase those squirrels and jump over fallen trees. Be happy. Thank you so much for being our dog, you enriched our lives. Love you always.

Jake`s Progress

I thought it was time that I updated you on Jake`s progress. he`s actually doing really well and doesn`t look ill at all. Last weekend he was a bit under the weather, refusing to eat all his food and bringing all that he did. On the Monday morning I was planning to take him to the vet but all of a sudden he was back to normal with no sign of illness whatsoever. I think in a perverse way if he looked ill and acted ill then I could accept that his time is short. I keep having to convince myself of the words of the lab report, @prognosis guarded to poor" and the chest x-ray that I saw with my own eyes, the tiny white dots in his lungs that look far from sinister but of course are just that.

HOWEVER.....Jake is with us and doing well and if I have anything to do with it he`ll still be here in a years time. While Jim was out with him the other day an elderly lady stopped to stroke Jake. he told me that she just kept saying how beautiful he was and what a lovely dog, Jim didn`t have the heart to tell her he isn`t well. How could anyone?

Everyone here is well, I say that because I haven`t posted for ages about any of them The only downside is that Danny has finally ended his relationship with Salina after 6yrs together. I won`t say anymore about it because it`s a deeply private mnatter between the two of them. At least now a line can be drawn and Dan can get on with his life. I want my son to be happy more than anything else whatever life throws at him.

Roman and Sophie are really doing well. Roman is in full-time school and loving every minute. He`s usually the first to get there and the last to leave. On Wednesday and Thursday last week he was given two "Teacher`s Helper" awards, the second one with a gold star, he was so proud to get them and so are we. :o)

Sophie is almost 7 mths now and is has been sitting unaided for a while now. She is totally fearless and nothing seems to bother her. Roman can be unintentionally a bit rough with her, as older siblings are at times but all she does is laugh in his face. Kerry says she`s much tougher than Roman ever was and that she`ll soon be wearing the trousers...lol! She even grabs hold of him sometimes and he calls to his mum that "Sophie is hurting me" lol!





Sitting in my living room.



Ready for his first day at school.

The garden centre is gearing up for Christmas and our display is all in place. Mind you, Christmas isn`t that far away now. I`ve done quite a bit of my Christmas shopping already because I can`t stand the crowds and I worry that I won`t get everything in time. I love shopping for the grandchildren because its such funny choosing toys that I know they`ll like. I know Sophie is only a baby but she loves her toys, especially those that make loud noises...poor Kerry and Slava...lol! And of course there are the clothes to buy. There has always been more choice of girls clothes so I am going to be in my element. I loved buying for Kerry when she was a baby but now there is even more to choose from, where will I start...? :o)

Jim has bought me a really good pair of secateurs for Christmas. He asked what I wanted and even though he thought it a bit odd that was what I wanted. With the amount of gardening I do I need good tools. I never thought I`d get excited about secateurs, perfume, clothes maybe...lol!

Anyway my friends, I`ll say goodbye for now. take care and have a good weekend.

Love and Hugs

Sandra xxxx

My Gorgeous Boy Jake

Hello friends,

Many of you will know by now that my gorgeous boy Jake is very poorly. He was diagnosed with cancer last week after he having problems with his front leg. We thought he`d just pulled something or maybe a touch of arthritis, alas it wasn`t to be. Our lovely vet Stella did a needle biopsy on one of his lymph glands as they were swollen and unfortunately it was the worst possible diagnosis.

The cells found were secondaries and even now we are not 100% sure where the primary tumour is. Most likely it is buried deep inside his armpit, out of sight and spreading its poison around his body. He had been doing a lot of things slower of late but then in dog years he is middle-aged and of course it seemed a natural progression.

The limp started just a couple of weeks ago on a Saturday. Come the Monday Jim was at the vets. The only thing that DID worry us was a couple of times while he was sleeping he let out a scream, not a yelp, but a blood-curdling scream of pain. Perhaps we knew it was serious but then you never want to think the worst with a beloved pet.

Jake has been given just 3-6 mths, such a short time left to spend with our boy but my goodness are we going to enjoy every minute of it. he`s on an excellent painkiller which has completely changed his day to day life. He has boundless energy now he is free from pain again and he`s eating really well again. The only thing is I`m making sure he doesn`t overdo things. I won`t let him lie on the grass in case he gets cold, the vet warned me about that. I have to watch out for any changes at all in his health. Last evening he coughed for the first time, just a soft, slight cough but still a sign that the tiny tumours in his lungs maybe growing. I knew they were there because I saw his chest x-ray but I had hoped they wouldn`t trouble him just yet.

After the initial shock and more than a few tears I decided not to get too upset yet, they`ll be time enough for that later. I will stay upbeat for Jake`s sake, if he sees me upset, (which he has done in the past) it`ll will upset him and there`s no need for that. I did get upset this afternoon at the park, watching him running around. How can such a healthy looking dog be so ill? Is the diagnosis wrong? Was it mixed up with some other poor dog? Somehow if he looked ill I could accept it easier, but he doesn`t. His coat is as shiny as ever and his eyes as bright. His labrador exuberance knows no bounds. Oh dear, what will I do without him?

Now I AM crying...........

Thanks especially to Jeannette and Frances, my dear friends. Jeannette for your support when we talked on the phone, you`ve been there and understand completely.
My thanks to Guido for putting an entry on Call for Support, many friends have rallied round because of it.
Thanks also to all of you who have offered up prayers and kind words of support for Jake. You are all so kind, bless you all.

For any who would say, all that for a dog. I say...absolutely!


I will keep you all updated as to Jake`s condition. next time I`ll most likely write about what`s been going on in my life.

Bye Bye for now

I`m Still Here!

Hello, it`s me!

It`s almost a month since my last entry and I`ve done so much in that time. The only problem being that I can`t remember exactly what, at least in the proper order of events that is...lol! Anyway, I`ll do my best and try to update you before my mind goes completely blank. I apologise now for the randomness (is that a word?) of the entry.

Right, since Roman`s birthday we have been to a theme park, Paultons Park in Hampshire. Perfect for young children and their famillies. None of the rides are really scary and Roman was able to go on most of them. Paultons is set in beautiful countryside, well away from main roads etc. There is a small zoo there, pretty gardens to walk around too. I would thoroughly recommend it to any of you who would like a nice day out with the family. We had a fantastic day there and Roman was in his element.



A few days after the trip to Paultons I had a weeks holiday from work and went to stay with Kerry and the children. Jim was working most of the week and I didn`t want to spend my days doing nothing, I just have to be busy and at Kerry`s there`s always something to do. I left strict instructions on what to do each day in the garden, what to water and when and to watch the tomatoes for signs of blight. As it happened the garden was to be the least of my worries but back to that in a minute. I enjoyed helping around the house, doing the gardening. Poor Slava`s tomatoes had the dreaded blight and we had to throw the whole crop away as it was too far gone to save. I put some new plants in as slugs had had a feast on the marigolds and they had little Summer colour left. We went out every day and I got to know Sophie much better and we came to an understanding. We were friends at last and she did me the honour of smiling for the whole time I was there. Somehow I think we have seen the last of "grumpy Sophie" and "happy Sophie" has replaced her for good! I managed to convince her that I, her Nanna was a nice person who would always be there for her the way I am with my Roman. While we were there Kerry showed me Roman`s school uniform that he will wear to big school in September. I must admit it brought a lump to my throat seeing his brand new grown-up boys clothes. When did my darling little boy become old enough for school and where did the last four years go? I just don`t know, he`s seems so grown up though he still enjoys a cuddle, though not quite as much as he did. Sometimes I say to him teasingly that he is still my baby. He says very forcefully, " No I`m NOT a baby Nanna, I`m a big boy now!" That told me didn`t it...lol!






My big boy playing footie with Daddy and Uncle Dan


Of course I mentioned the garden being the least of my problems, well you`ll love this.

What happened was on the Saturday, the day before I was due to come home I had a phone call from Jim. He had been calling every day but not first thing in the morning. This time he sounded worried.

JIM: I`ve been stung by a bee!

ME: Are you sure it`s a bee and not a wasp?

JIM: Well it`s lying dead on the floor and it`s furry so it must be a bee...oh and I pulled the sting out of my neck.

ME: But you`re ok?

JIM: Yes, but it hurts, where`s the AfterBite?

ME: Top shelf in the wardrobe.

JIM: Thanks, I`ll see to that first then I`ve lots to do this morning, I have to get the suitcases out of the loft for Kerry and Slava. See you tomorrow afternoon.

ME: Ok Love, take care, Bye!


Well Kerry and I went out for the day with the children and I thought no more about the phone call. We spent the day at Beale Park, a small zoo with a few kiddie rides set in lovely surroundings by the river Thames, there are some lovely places near to Kerry. Anyway, after the day out we went for a meal in a nice family restaurant, again set in beautiful countryside...Oh dear, there I go again...lol! By the time we got home it was 7.30 and almost as soon as we got in the door the phone rang...I just knew it was Jim and there was a problem.

Jim: You won`t believe what happened to me.

Me: Do I need to sit down?

Jim: laughs...No but I have to tell you I`ve had a bit of an accident.

Me: WHAT!

Jim: Erm...well, when I went up to get the suitcases, the ladder collapsed on the way down, taking me AND the ladder with it....down the stairs...erm...I`m a bit bruised, well no, make that VERY bruised...and a bit battered...and I`ve sprained my ankle and my neck and shoulders are really sore....

Me: ARE YOU ALRIGHT? I MEAN, HAVE YOU SEEN A DOCTOR???
How on earth did you fall?

Jim: Er...I didn`t tighten the ladder properly and it just gave way.

Anyway, this continued until I was convinced he was alright and he didn`t need me to come home, Kerry would have brought me home right away but he insisted I stay. I made him promise not to do anything even slightly dangerous until I was home again. He promised and said he was going to bed, the safest option in my opinion.

I spent half the night tossing and turning about his accident and what could have happened. He could have been seriously injured or even killed and he was on his own, it didn`t bear thinking about what the consequences could have been. The next day he arrived and I was shocked at the state of his injuries. He was covered in black, red and purple bruises. His ankle wasn`t sprained after all but was really badly bruised. Roman thought his grandad looked wonderful, a real hero. Not everyone`s grandad had bruises like HIS grandad...lol!

Over a fortnight on, the bruises are still there though faded somewhat, they are still sore and Jim hads decided to have a loft ladder fitted....by an expert. There`s no way I will allow him up that ladder again...ever!

I myself had some blood tests last week. I`ve been having these waves of fatigue for the last few months and I`m fed up with them. One minute I feel absolutely fine and the next I feel completely exhausted. The exhaustion passes after about 30 mins but I want to know what`s going on. The doc says I might need some more vitamin B12 injections, oh great, they are really painful. Or maybe vitamin D, common in older people he says...thanks Doc! Or maybe diabetes. On a serious note, I really hope not. Either way, I will know for sure by Friday, I`ll let you know.





Kerry, me and Salina with Sophie...she weighs almost 16lbs now!

Kerry and family are in Russia at the moment and will be home on Monday evening. Kerry has called me a couple of times but has to call from her in-laws home so she can`t say to much. I asked her if she was enjoying herself. Her exact words were, "Oh you know!" In simple terms that means she`s not. Oh dear, I had a feeling she wouldn`t, she`s going to tell me all about it when she comes home. Anyway, after this long, rambling entry I`ll say goodbye before you all fall asleep!

I`ll be visiting as many journals as possible this evening and will comment too. I hope you are all well and having a good day. Bye for now. :o)

Happy Birthday To Roman

Hello Everyone,

Today is my darling grandson Roman`s fourth birthday and I`m finding it hard to believe. Fours years old already! Mind you, if you could listen to him he sounds like a mini adult at times the things he comes out with.

Last Saturday week was his birthday party which was a great success. The weather stayed fine all afternoon and all his little friends enjoyed themselves. They were all very good which was a bit surprising considering there were eight 4 yr old boys in attendance. I took some great photos of them altogether but for obvious reasons I can`t publish them on here.

I can however show you some of Roman at his party,



The "Roary" birthday cake made by his Auntie Beryl


Attacking me with his inflatable sword...lol!



Looking cute

Today Kerry and I took him to Windsor to feed the ducks. As we walked along the river he told me all about his presents and the new school he will be attending full time in September, and his girlfriend Connie! He is so proud of the new scooter that his mummy and daddy bought him and of course the turbo-charged, super-dooper water pistol that Kerry thought was a good idea. He told me very matter of factly that he intends to shoot daddy with it....I wouldn`t want to be in Slava`s shoes...lol! Jim and I gave him his presents at the party but held one back for today. He`s always wanted a fire engine so that was what he got today, he loves it and it was a joy to see his face when he opened it. He`s just so grown in so many ways but to me he`ll always be my special boy! I know many of you have watched his progress from birth so I hope you will join me in wishing him a very Happy Birthday. :o)

A Saturday Catch up

It`s been an odd week. I`ve had news that three friends are very unwell with potentially serious conditions. To preserve their privacy I won`t go into details but it`s very worrying. I don`t see any of them on a day to day basis but I wish them all well and hope they all recover quickly.

I haven`t been feeling 100% myself if I`m honest. It`s most likely nothing more than a virus but this morning I awoke with a painful throat. Hopefully it will come to nothing as it usually does. Also I have had a small painless cyst on my bottom lip for a few years. When I first noticed it I had it checked by a doctor just to be on the safe side. I was told to forget it and so I have done until now. Yesterday evening it became very painful and swollen and I look as though I`ve been in a fight! I`ll see how it is on Monday and if it`s still as bad I`ll make an appointment to see the doctor.

Roman has his 4th birthday party on Saturday 18th. It`s not his birthday until the 28th but Kerry has decided to have it early before any of his friends go away on holiday. We are hoping for good weather because there are a lot of people coming and she only has a small house so we need the space in the garden for all the guests. In case of rain we have a gazebo to keep everyone dry.

Today Kerry went shopping for Roman`s school uniform and spent what amounted to a small fortune. Of course she had to buy everything with the school emblem from the official school shop which always makes it more expensive. On top of that there are still the new shoes, socks and plimsolls/sneakers to be bought. I told her that I will buy the coat and Jim will get the shoes at the end of the month. I still find it hard to believe that Roman is old enough for full-time school but he just can`t wait to go. For such a young child he is frighteningly independent and so unlike he was just a year ago. There was a time when he shied away from other children and now he makes friends wherever he goes.

Sophie has had a dreadful cold but is over it and back to her usual self. As Kerry said, " I know she`s feeling better because she`s crying again so that everyone knows she`s there!" Oh yes, that`s my Sophie...quiet and laid back is just not her way...lol! She is beautiful when she smiles though, it`s just that I don`t think smiling is her style at the moment.

I`ve noticed Blogger is very quiet and many of my old friends just don`t post as often as before, and I thought I was the only one. I don`t know if it is the AOL journals effect or just that real life is getting in the way of computer time. I know I`m in no position to talk as I know I don`t post much these days, but its just an observation. I won`t stop posting altogether but it`s a lot different to how it used to be. I don`t know if I`m the only one but at the moment I can`t change the font on my posting as the tool that you change it with has disappeared, so has the colour change too. I just wonder if Blogger know about it and are they doing anything about it?

I`m not busy at work now the planting season has passed but I`m happy to be able to spend some more time in my garden. The runner beans have provided us with enough beans for several meals already. I`ve had ripe blueberries and a couple of tasty tomatoes and I`m hopefully for lots and lots more. Since the heatwave has been replaced with cooler, more overcast weather it seems to be slowing everything down in the garden, even the weeds which I`m happy to say I`m on top of. At the moment we are planning the extension to our patio and the further alteration of the flower beds. I`ll never be happy with my garden as it is and constantly feel the need to change it. I suppose though that a garden is an ongoing thing which really is never finished whatever you do to it. I just hope I can stay healthy so I can work outside for as many years as possible.

Anyway, I`ll finish now as it`s time for my evening meal and despite feeling a bit under the weather my appetite is good as ever. Take care all of you and have a great weekend. :o)

I`m Still Here!

Me at RHS Wisley




On the beach at Boscombe




Roman having fun on a bouncy castle at his cousin Charlie`s birthday party.


Isn`t she gorgeous?



Hello everyone,

I thought I`d better post an entry as it`s been weeks since my last one. I suppose with one thing and another, ie; real life and probably a bit of laziness thrown in has something to do with it.

Anyway, I`m here now so I`ll quickly let you know how we all are.

I`m fine, very busy at work and in my garden. Housework is taking second place to the garden but I`m still managing to get everything done eventually, at the expense of computer time and even watching TV. Jim is also very well. he`s been doing some fishing, including his much awaited sea fishing trip. To my displeasure he gave all the fish he caught to Danny and Slava...hmm...its not as if they didn`t catch anything either...Oh well, its back to fish fingers I suppose...lol!

Roman and Sophie are really thriving. Roman had his last big school visit today and Kerry was introduced to his new teacher Mrs. Andrews. Kerry was relieved that she seemed very nice and was surprised to find Roman had met her previously. It all sounds very grown-up and Roman can`t wait to go. The only downside for him is that his best friend Toby lives in a different catchment area so will be attending another school. Luckily Toby`s mum and Kerry have become friends so they will still see each other regularly. They are inseparable and think the world of each other.

Sophie is 12 weeks old now and is 14lbs. She hasn`t been the easiest baby, temperament-wise but she seems to be settling down a bit more now. Up until recently she cried whoever picked her up, including ME, her devoted grandmother (that never happened with Roman!) Lately though she seems to be mellowing and hopefully will be as laid back as her big brother. I must admit I have enjoyed buying pretty little dresses for her though she grows so quickly I tend to buy cheaper ones now. She is wearing clothes for a size 6-9 month old baby as 3-6 is just too small now. The way shes growing she`ll be bigger than Roman before she`s a year old...lol!

As you will know if you live in the British Isles, many of us have been sweltering in a heatwave the last fortnight. I love Summer, but Oh my goodness, it`s just that bit too hot for me at the moment. A slight breeze would be nice, just to cool things down a degree or too along with some steady overnight rainfall because I`m fed up with carry watering cans up and down the garden night after night. My arms are so long now I`m starting to resemble an Orangutan!

A few weeks ago I had a weeks holiday, if you can call it that. I think I was busier that week than when I`m getting paid for working. On the Monday I went out shopping on my own, a rare treat. I think the best bit was sitting in Starbucks with a cappuchino and some fruit bread, reading a magazine and just relaxing...perfect. That was the last leisurly day though. On Tuesday we took Roman to Boscombe in Dorset for the day. We`d never been there before but I`d read that it was a lovely place but quieter than it`s neighbour Bournemouth. Well we had a wonderful day there. The car park was just a few yards for the beach, which was sandy and very clean. The whole area was very well kept and with the weather also being excellent we couldn`t have had a better day. Roman loved making sand castles and was a very good boy all day. We had a lovely lunch at a nice restaurant overlooking the beach. In fact it was a perfect day for us all.

On the Wednesday Jim and I did some work in the garden, he`s been painting the fences and putting up some new trellis`s for me. We really did work hard all day and I really pleased with the progress in my garden. We have plans to extend the patio and widen and reshape the flower beds. I know once its finished it will look really good, though it will probably take ages to do, which of course is all the fun of gardening. I must admit that evening we DID have rather sore backs though a good night`s sleep took care of that.

On Thursday we visited the Royal Horticultural Gardens at Wisley in Surrey. It was another lovely day though a bit cooler, just the way it should be when there is a lot of walking involved. It was a thoroughly enjoyable day out but very tiring and hard on the legs. They had some lovely plants that I had my eye on but when I visited their plant centre the best ones that I wanted had all sold out...sigh. H-o-w-e-v-e-r....me being me didn`t let a little thing like that stop me from buying a `few` new plants. Oh no, I spent an hour and a half selecting some new specimens to add to my borders. Poor Jim, who was pushing the trolley for me kept reminding me of how long we`d been there. Yes I know his feet DID probably ache...but so did mine but the plants were more important...lol! ;o)

On the Friday it rained so I decided to use that time doing housework, very boring but necessary. It might have been a week of but I was relived to get back to work for a well earned rest...lol!

Do you know, despite not writing for so long I can`t for the life of me think what else has happened over the last few weeks. Well of course I HAVE been watching tennis at Wimbledon and this afternoon watched our own Andy Murray lose to Andy Roddick. I`m disappointed but he`s very talented and only just 22, he`ll be back next year that`s for certain.

Anyway, my friends, if I`ve got any left that is! I hope you`re all well and do have a lovely weekend. Take care. :o)